Ena Lelah wa Ina Elayhi Raje3oon

Early this morning my mother in law passed away:o(

She has been in a coma since last Friday, so we kinda of had a week to prepare for this....but you can never be prepared for a loved one dying...

I am just glad my husband went to Amman to see her when we heard the news. Everyone told him to stay put and not to go , it is useless...she is a coma, what is the point...but he got to spend some time with her...see her, touch her, talk to her, kiss her...I am so glad he did not listen and I was able to convince him to leave as soon as we got the news...

I am just so sad that I will never see her again....baby Tamer will never know his teta, and she never got to see Ziad (her favourite grandson) again...Bilal will never really know her, since last time he saw her he was only 3...I wish we were able to go to Amman this past summer...but my husband started a new job in May, and he could not take time off, and I could not travel alone with 3 kids including a little baby...:o(

May she rest in peace inshallah....at least now she will not be in any pain...something that she has lived with constantly for the past few years....Allah yer7amik khalto! :o(

wearing black for Gaza...

My heart cries out for the people in Gaza...:'( Inshallah allah yefregha 3aleehom and yensorhom

Allah yer7am our Martyrs and ysaber their families...

Puhleeeeeezzzzzzzz

Few days ago as I was walking down the street in search of taxi, I had the misfortune of running into a very obnoxious,rude and annoying person. It was during the noon athan, and I hate to wait for a cap in front of the mosque so I decided to walk to the gardens. It is two blocks away. A car passed me, and then he turned around came back and stopped me. he asked me for my number and I said no and kept on walking, but this idiot would not take no for an answer, he kept on driving beside me for the two blocks asking for my number and trying to give me his number ! It was creepy! I was glad I was on a busy road in the middle of the day; otherwise it would have been scary!! He did not get lost until I got into the taxi and somehow we lost him in the traffic, yes he followed the taxi!

I was very grossed out and very offended by this experience.

The man in the car was from Saudi Arabia, I did not really look at him, but I’d guess he is in his late twenties. He is riding an expensive Mercedes, with which he is aparently trying to impress. What the hell makes him think that he can come to Amman, and pick random girls off the street. Does he think Amman girls will be so impressed by his car, and will give him what he is apparently here for? This is very offensive in my opinion. No?

bye bye

I hate goodbyes, especially when you are saying farewell to your husband. Well it was not easy on my mother in law either, so I guess it is hard on mothers too...one day I will find out how hard it is...but lets stay in the present for now.

Hubby left today. He should be on the plane headed home as we speak, unless RJ is late which is very likely...I pray it is on time, since there are only two hours between RJ arriving to Montreal , and his flight to Saskatoon taking off. I wish I was leaving with him. Not because I do not like Jordan, once I get over the stress of crossing the streets, the jerks I have to meet whenever I go out shopping in the neighbourhood, and the fact that my hubby is thousands of miles away, Amman has been a lot of fun and I love living here.

We had a nice visit with hubby, but it was too short! I am not looking forward to the kids coming home and not finding their dad. Ziad knows that hubby is leaving today, and he was not happy when we told him few days ago. He cried and broke our hearts, saying that he does not want his daddy to leave. Bilal still does not get it, I told him that baba is going to Canada today, he just stopped smiling. I can see him mopping around the apartment looking for his daddy, he did this for few days when we first came here.

we did not get to go anywhere. one week was during Ramadan and all hubby did was sleep all day , his mother's orders! so annoying, everytime she sees him she would tell him to go sleep, 7aram inta sayem! we also could not go anywhere because my mother in law is not feeling too great and hubby did not want to leave here, so there goes our planned trip to egypt or lebanon...hopefully next time he is here we will get to go.

It was so much easier for me when he was here. He did a lot of things for us and took the kids places. He did drive us crazy few times, and I wanted to push him off the balcony on few occasions...but I already miss him so much. I booked his flight for December. He will miss Eid, but the tickets during that time are outrageously expensive, since it Eid, hajj, and Christmas time. O well...he comes on the 27th of December and stays for a bit over three weeks. The count down begins. This is the last time I will live away from my husband!

so far , so not good...(warning complaining ahead...enter at own risk)

So Ramadan in an Arabic country is not really that different than it is back at home!! This is my conclusion so far! I have had iftar by myself almost everyday. It does not feel so ramdani...the only thing that reminds me that it is Ramadan is the amount of cars parked in front of the masjid. So I guess more people pray at the masjid in Ramadan.

But really this is not any different than Ramadan in Canada. Since I got married Ramadan started being different; especially because the first few years of our marriage my husband did not fast.

When I was living at home with my parents Ramadan had a different feel...I guess it does not matter where you are. It is the people around you that make it special. My parents had people over in Ramadan at least 3 times a week. And we were invited to people’s house at least 2 times a week. And on days we did eat alone, it was the six of us; so really it did not feel lonely at all.

Even after getting married we still had iftar with my family and friends few times a week. On Saturday we used to rent a hall with seven or ten other families and we each brought one dish and we ate iftar together. Those were fun iftars...the men went for tarawe7 prayers after eating while us ladies sat around chatted and munched on yummy Arabic sweets!!

In Canada during Ramadan I can wear whatever I want without hearing idiots telling me how I should and should not dress...if I am not fasting for any reason I can still eat wherever I want. If I am at the mall and get thirsty I can buy a bottle of water and drink it without anyone looking at me and estagfering Allah.

I really thought it would be different here...but it is not! Maybe if hubby was here we would be invited to places and do more things after iftar...but I don’t know...so far so not good! So tell me, what is so special about Ramadan here?? Am I missing something?? And btw the atayef here! Yuck! My mom makes them a million and ten times better!

Palestinian Children

I borrowed this video from Summer's blog

I still have no idea how to post a clip on my blog..if anyone knows feel free to help me:)

anyways...this is so sad, I feel so helpless not being able to do anything to help these kids out. I lived in a Palestinian camp in Lebanon for few months, and I went to school there from preschool to grade 6. The camps were horrible and at some places disgusting, but they are 100000000000000000x times better than the camps in palestine, so I can not even begin to imagine how horrible their lives in these camps are.

The URL to the video is:
http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.fullscreen&videoid=1380469430